I saw my future today. In every homeless street person digging through garbage and pushing a cart of their belongings or carrying them in a series of bags.
In trying to take responsibility for two people, that’s how I might very well end up if I’m not careful. My own foundation isn’t even properly built up, yet I constantly let certain others squander what little I manage to get for myself on trivial things like snacks and junk rather than putting something aside for my own future or even present needs. This person has already messed their life up and is seemingly, vicariously, trying to do the same with mine but its only today that I saw it with clear eyes.
I’m glad I saw it though because it gave me perspective on my life these past twenty-nine years. I’ve been nothing more than a pacifier and plaything in the eyes of others, designed to keep what they’ve chosen to ignore out of sight and out of mind. Well, I’m now fully fed up with it. They can do the hand holding on their own now. I’m done.