It has been eight days since the beginning of the year and twelve days since the idea of not buying anything entered into my mind as a primary challenge for the year. Thus far, I am in keeping with the no-buy challenge. I haven’t gotten anything unnecessary to the functioning of this household. That’s a win.
However, my secondary challenge for this year is to take more Me Time in order to piece myself back together from the mental shredding I’ve been going through over the past several years. This is proving more difficult. I appear to be incapable of putting aside time for myself in a way that is necessary to aid in my healing. I appear to be struggling to fulfill my own needs as far as relaxation is concerned.
I honestly don’t know how I got like this. I’m taking steps to combat it though. If I hadn’t intervened and made myself take a break, I don’t know where I might have ended up.
Speaking of restful things. I’m going to go do some reading. I’m currently reading a book I haven’t picked up in twenty-odd years. The Sword of Shannara by Terry Brooks. My plan is to slowly read the first eight books in the Shannara ‘verse as that’s what I have. After that, I might knit some.
One mistake that I’m still making is that I am primarily knitting for others rather than myself. I promised myself I wouldn’t do that, without pay, as much anymore for the foreseeable future but, here I am, with a cardigan cast on for The Maternal Parental while I still have yet to knit myself a new hat when I’m long overdue for one and I only just completed weaving in the ends on the gloves I ‘finished’ for myself in November 2018. I need to put a stop to this nonsense. Don’t get me wrong, it is a lovely cardigan pattern.
I’m still not able to figure out why I’m in such a dire need to do for others when I haven’t and won’t do for myself. That’s something else I really must get to the bottom of. In the meantime, I think I’ll be a prime example of Start-itis and cast on for my hat if only to reclaim my time. In case you’re wondering, The Brioche Galaxy Hat is the pattern I’m determined to make for myself. I do find myself wondering if other craft loving people do the same self-sacrificing things?
Thanks for reading. Have a fantastic day.