Happy Birthday To Me

Hey, I’m almost thirty-five years old. Wow. Anyway, to the posting.

 

For some time now, I have been unable to sleep without a lot of effort. This has proved exhausting to my life and my schedule. So exhausting that, paradoxically, I have frequently gone days without adequate sleep. I’m not sure what has been causing this but I am hoping it will go away soon. My pdoc prescribed 50mg of diphenhydramine for this issue and…it didn’t work. There I was, in bed all night long, staring at the backs of my eyelids, wishing for some kind of intervention that would give me a good night’s rest.

 

I wasn’t worried about anything.

I wasn’t agitated.

I wasn’t upset.

I just couldn’t sleep for some reason.

 

My sleep issues had gotten to the point where they’d affected my writing abilities, my knitting and crocheting abilities, my physical health, my coordination and fine motor skills in cooking. Imagine being sleep deprived while trying to work with a sharp knife, a heated stovetop, or a boiling hot pot of water? Yeah, my lack of sleep was a detriment to myself and others after a while.

 

The one thing I could still do was screw up my vision to focus, barely. So, I read books: both eBooks and Treebooks in my possession until my brain didn’t want to take in more information. Once the overload was completed, I took my meds, went to bed and…after two and a half hours, fell asleep for two blocks of sleep totaling eight hours and forty seven minutes. Yay.

 

As of right now, I’m still more than a bit shaky but, as you can see, I am writing again. Hopefully, with more sleep and time to recover, I can work on those stories and crafting projects of mine. 

 

Speaking of books and media. I think it’s time for another cull. I’m taking out the books with dated information, gleaning what I can from them before sending them for recycling if possible. The movies, I’m going to view them once more (the unwanted) before donating them to charity or selling them. After all, I do have a challenge on Goodreads to read at least fifty books before the end of the year. This seems like a good way to do it.

 

On the Aerogarden front, the Aerogarden of Serendipity continues to amaze me.

 

2016-03-31 10.20.12

This is representative of thirty three days of growth. I have cut all visible plants back several times and they just keep on growing like they’re Kudzu or something. The Genovese Basil is particularly scary…I mean amazing as I cut it back to nothing more than a few leaf tips less than ten days prior and it grew back in record time. It is now overtaking the “Thai” Basil, pushing aside the Mint and shading the Cilantro. I had to raise the Light hood a bit to accommodate it.

 

I did have to get replacements for two pods. The Chives, well, to be honest Chive, died on me. The Cilantro never sprouted. So, I am now waiting for these replacements to grow. I hope they do. My room normally smells pretty good but, right now, it smells extra lovely. It’s very fragrant and smells of Basil, Mint, and Dill.

 

Due to my lack of coordination, I haven’t done much in the way of crocheting. I hope to change that in the next few days as my strength returns.

 

Thank you for reading. Have a great evening.

Face Value Dating

I don’t normally post about Polyamory topics because, it’s my private life and others do it far more eloquently than I ever could.

However, an agony aunt letter in the Love Letters section of Boston.com led me to write this.

In the letter, the petitioner for advice was bemoaning how a potential (in her mind) love interest wasn’t going along with her ideal fantasy of the way things should go. Namely, that he should drop everything and instantly do exactly as she wished with no thought or regard to his own condition, despite his being honest from the beginning about being non-monogamous. Yes, you’ve read this right. He came right out in the beginning and said he was non-monogamous. He must have thought highly of her initially before it all went Loony Toons.

My hat goes off to him for his unflinching honesty.

Anyway, back to the tale. Instead of accepting what he said at face value, she decides to, in her words, “call his bluff” and say that she’s “fine with Polyamory” when it comes up a second time. This is despite the fact that she’s apparently deeply monogamous and not even remotely interested in being Polyamorous.

 

*scratching head in a most confused manner*

Most of you can guess what’s coming. It eventually gets to the point where he texts her with his misgivings about her not being mature enough to understand his need for Polyamory. She then has the nerve to write in this letter that she has anxiety over this situation when she caused this whole drama fest by saying she was okay with his being Polyamorous in the first place. She’s saying she made concessions and asks of the advice giver when she she should stop making these imagined concessions and give up on the relationship.

1. You are a liar.

2. You are a manipulator.

3. You’ve brought this drama into your own life all by yourself by trying to change this guy.

That man was open, honest and completely upfront about himself from day one. With all due respect, you were not. You tried to change him and it blew up in your face. You need to accept that and move on. It’s not you that needs to get away from him, it’s him that needs to fly away from you. You are a drama llama. Nice talking.

And they call me crazy.

First Green Sproutings

This blog entry was simulcast on my GardenStew blog, Polycotyledon. Please check out GardenStew, it’s a really great community.

 

I looked in on the Aerogarden of Serendipity today and the Genovese Basil is sprouting up after only three days being “planted”. It’s actually beating out the Thai Basil, which was supposed to come up first. Regardless of which is first in sprouting, it’s lovely to see them. I love growing things.

In other news, I had an opportunity to show The Maternal Parental the future site of My Not So Secret Garden today. We were riding in a cab with a really rude and dismissive cab driver. When I explained my plans for the garden plot I’m hoping to get, to my mother, he was really negative about the whole plan.

My actual plans are to grow food for The Maternal Parental and I, with a portion going to my friend for helping us out so much, as well as another friend who may or mayn’t take up the offer due to his living so far from me. Any extra food will be given to those in need.

From both my own experience being impoverished and from watching Gardening programs that focus on community activism, I’m all too well aware that most food banks don’t have a ready supply of perishable, fresh fruits and vegetables. It’s mostly canned goods, boxed goods, and bagged goods.

While it certainly sustains, it’s not always the healthiest option out there when compared with fresh produce. Being honest, and I have written about this in the past on my blog, fresh produce is a nightmare to get ahold of when you’re on a limited budget. So, my plan was to give the extra to the food bank or, if they were unwilling/unable to take it, find a family in need to give it to free of charge.

Apparently, that was all too much for the allegedly charitable cab driver who scoffed at the notion and tried to poke holes in every aspect of my plan.

It’s like, dude, why are you so invested in tearing my idea down? I hardly know ye and your dedication to obstruction goes way beyond constructive criticism.

Anyway…tangent.

So, The Maternal Parental got a chance to see the site and loved it. Though, she is worried about my ability to get there due to the Agoraphobia issue. I feel much more confident about it though. Between my friend taking me there on a semi-regular to regular basis and the distance being relatively short from the nearest bus stop, I feel somewhat confident that I can make it there.

I just need to actually get my hands on the site first…

Obrigada Shawl Completed

2016-02-14 17.48.19

 

Now that the shawl is completed, all I need to do is save up the money to send it off to its new Human.

 

Here’s another picture of my view right now aside from this computer. Every last one of these tomatoes is green. Just my luck.

 

2016-02-19 21.36.43

 

In truth, I’m very exhausted right now but I cannot get to sleep due to so many people deciding to call, message, etc. either me or this house. I’m really REALLY hoping to catch up on my sleep tonight.

Incidentally, I’m looking to make some more friends on NaNoWriMo’s website. If you’re planning to participate this year and you’re interested in being friends, please feel free to add me. I’m “xantedeschia” on that site as well.

As much as it was difficult to do, I really enjoyed the creative process that came about during NaNoWriMo.

Pile It On and Watch Me Crunch

To say that this week has been stressful would be an understatement.

I am doing NaNoWriMo AKA National Novel Writing Month this month. I’m in the process of writing out a novel I’m calling Forsaken Paladins. I think I’m doing good at any rate. Also, friends who have read what I have thus far have given me positive reviews based on what they’ve read. So, that’s something. However, it is stressful having to complete this journey and go through life at the same time.

 

For the time being, I have put off doing all knitting and crocheting projects to enable me to focus on the task at hand, which is writing. I will not touch the yarn, hooks, and needles until 1 December 2015, no matter how bad it gets. Believe me, it’s bad right now but I’m keeping to this vow.

 

I almost wasn’t going to blog either but something happened that demands a venting. It’s a stressor on top of a stressful situation on top of an already stressed out situation.

 

I have recently, within the last day, found out that I’ve been knocked into a higher risk bracket for the possibility of colon cancer. So now, instead of at age fifty, I have to go get my colonoscopy at age 40. Crap, that’s less than six years from now. That’s stressor number one.

 

This warning klaxon was sounded when a first degree relative went for their colonoscopy and a large, golf ball sized polyp was found, removed, and sent for biopsy to determine malignancy or benignity. That’s stressor number two.

 

On top of this, my dear sweet asthma seems to be getting worse. The “bronchitis” I thought I was suffering from for more than six weeks turned out to be my asthmatic lungs showing off. They’ve never done it to this level before. I can’t take a deep breath without a deep, booming, life sucking, unproductive cough and, let me tell you, the coughing fits lost their magic weeks ago. That’s stressor number three.

 

All of this is kind of putting a cramp in my writing for NaNoWriMo 2015. I’ll be the first to admit it. Nevertheless, I am not giving up and I am not giving in. I made a promise to myself that I would write out fifty thousand or more words by 30 November and so I shall. As of right now, I’m at 13,166 words according to the NaNoWriMo site. I’ve got just 36,834 left to go to complete the threshold requirements though, personally, I think my story is going to go beyond the 50,000 word count.

 

I hope you’re all doing well. Please, take care.

Vampire Writing Hours

I’ve been so stressed out lately. I’m giving serious thought to inverting my schedule just so I can get some peace and quiet to write in. Apparently, it takes the passage of midnight for people to stop banging on the friggin’ front door or ringing the phone. Sometimes… *glare* …not even then will the noise stop.

 

The only writing I’ve gotten done is a story I’ve completed after nine years. It’s not for NaNoWriMo but it’s something I’ve been anxious about completing. I consider it done now at thirty-nine pages. Thanks to my friend, it has a title. I’ve put it up on a few sites, including my own InsaneJournal behind F-lock. I may put it up on another site a friend just told me about last night but, for that, I’ll have to go over it with a fine toothed comb for errors. I do that now but, as of now, it’s just me reading my writings. No Beta reader. I’ll just have to up my game of checking after myself. I did get positive feedback about it though. That’s something. Now, I just have to keep churning them out.

 

Finally have an appointment for the doctor to get this bronchitis checked out. I don’t have the strength or the patience to go to the offices with more open appointments available, so I’m waiting for the one in my area even though it’s got fewer available appointments and on a later date.

 

Speaking of appointments, I have an appointment to donate platelets in forty four days. This will be the first time I’ve been back in almost four years. Life and various tiny illnesses/injuries just kept getting in the way. Like this darn bronchitis. Hopefully, I’ll be in peak physical condition come my appointment time. I normally pull a high number too, whatever that means. I’ll remind myself to look up what that means. It’ll just be fun to be helping out again.

 

I’m also taking my buddy, Winky – the Blood Drop.

 

He’s a squeeze ball. I made him off of a pattern I found on Ravelry.

 

I’m getting sleepy now. So, I’m going to take a nap, so I can wake up at 1am my time to write. Later!

Busy Busy Bee

I have been quite busy lately. In addition to watching ALL THE MOVIES, I have been either harvesting fruit or watching flowers growing on my various plants. I’ve also been gearing up for NaNoWriMo and last but not least, I’ve been knitting and crocheting on projects.

 

First up are my socks that I call Rainstorm II. I’ve been technically working on these things since February. I hope to have them completed before the end of the week.

 

Next comes the Healing Hobbes Doll I’ve made for my cousin. The pattern for this doll may be found via a link on its Ravelry page. I switched it up a bit and used 12mm Darice plastic eyes instead of sewing on felt.

 

I haven’t been working on the Caregiver’s Cardigan like I should. Hopefully, once I’m finished with other projects, I can focus on it when I’m not writing.

 

Another pattern that has attracted my interest is the Keepsake Lace Shawl. I started making this one back in April but I messed up somewhere along the way and have to frog it before restarting. I’m doing this shawl in Bernat’s Handicrafter’s Crochet Thread in the colorway Orchid, which is kind of a dark purple.

 

I have also finally managed to get the pelargoniums to bloom. The flowers are coming in day by day, little by little. I’m really hoping for a red flower. The one coming in below looks to be a salmon color.

 

Plus, in the realm of resurrected from the pit of Doom, I give you the Little Boy Blue Blanket. For reasons I won’t go into, I’m going to be working on this one to completion.

 

Hopefully, I’ll get all of this completed by December and I’ll be able to relax and work on…the In Love With Color Throw.

 

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have work to do, horrid movies to watch, and tea to drink. Later.

Consequential Clicking

Who would have thought that clicking the Add Friend button on Social Media could be so difficult? I’ve been semi-compulsively hovering my mouse over that button on my sister’s profile page for the better part of two months now. I haven’t seen her in person since 2003 and I haven’t talked with her since 2004. I’m just hoping that the subterfuge I use to keep my identity secret doesn’t dissuade her from adding me to her friends list.

 

In other clicking, I’m back to the Rainstorm II socks. I’ve set a deadline of this weekend to be at or near completion and, for a change, I’m not laughing about this. I actually think I can achieve this goal with the proper application of hard work. I’m trying to build up a bunch of little achievements so I feel good enough about myself that I might actually successfully complete NaNoWriMo.

 

Onto still more clicking, I’ve been tapping away at the keyboard with a tentative story idea. Now all that remains is to flesh out the backstory, characters, outline and any other fluff and filler that might be required for this story to come to fruition.

 

Still more clicking, bear with me. I’ve been…what does one call “window shopping” when one is not in a brick and mortar environment? Anyway, I’ve been looking at clothing. I’m down to one pair of pants, no thanks to the Maternal Parental bogarting my pants from me. So, I’m going to get her and myself new pants before I put barbed wire and such between her and my new stuff.

 

Funny thing is, I would never have known Amazon had these pants had I not logged into my old K-Mart account. When I first bought these pants, I got them from the latter and had fully intended on going back for more. Since that time, they’ve stopped selling the ones I bought. Lucky for me, Amazon and a host of other merchants now sell them for cheapish prices.

 

In other news, I’ve finally made my friend’s son the bear I promised.

 

This makes the third bear of this pattern I’ve made. I’m resting this pattern for a bit while I go do other things. I’ll come back to it eventually but, for right now, I want to finish up other projects that are long overdue or calling to me like an resounding echo.

 

About the only other thing happening in my life right now is the fact that I’ve lost five pounds. Now, it’s just a matter of keeping it off.

 

Take care, Peoples of the Sun.

What On Earth Was I Thinking?

So yeah, I signed up to do NaNoWriMo this year.

 

I haven’t a clue how to hammer together a novel. I barely have a clue how to write coherently or with proper punctuation. A fifty-thousand word goal seems out of my reach but I won’t know if I can do it unless I try. That’s all I can give is my best effort. The hilarious thing is that I have ideas popping out of my head all over the place but will any of them measure up to the word quota?

 

Whatever I ultimately decide to do, I am backing it up both on disk and in the cloud. I’ve had several data loss scares both personal and social reminding me to do so.

 

I’m also doing NaKniSweMo and at least with that, I am on somewhat familiar territory even if the scale is a bit overwhelming. I know how to knit. I know how to do the stitches required according to the pattern. Even if I’m working in hideous pink, I’m at least able to make out what I’m supposed to be doing, albeit slowly, and make progress.

 

Oh yeah, I did a new video (YouTube Link). Shockingly, it doesn’t feature video of the Aerogarden of Hope. In this episode, I’m reading a Richard Laymon story called Night Games. What I should be reading are my old college textbooks on writing comprehension. Instead, I’m reading Julius Caesar’s Commentaries on the Gallic Wars.

 

I’m going to admit to being nervous about this NaNoWriMo thing but I’m going to face it. I’ve been running from actually writing something meaningful for a long time. It’s time I stopped running away from this and achieve a writing milestone for myself.

 

The Aerogarden of Hope is doing well. For anyone who follows me on Instagram, you’ve seen the pictures of the jalapeno pepper plant. It’s loaded with peppers right now. So much so, that the remaining flowers are dropping off because the plant can sustain no more fruit. There must be at least thirty growing peppers right now at various stages of development.

 

It will be ten weeks of this garden growing in four day’s time. From there, it’ll be two more weeks before the oldest of these peppers are ready to be harvested. At least, that’s what the updated literature says.

 

The tomatoes…are growing a bit slower. They have flowers and all but they’re very short and not getting nearly enough light. I’m really hoping that they’ll catch up to the pepper soon.

 

Aside from this stuff happening, the most amazing thing ever occurred last night. The Maternal Parental and I watched several Epic Rap Battles of History videos and…she enjoyed them. We’re talking genuine joy and not merely a feigned interest.

 

Shocking, I know.

 

I was so happy she wasn’t depressingly clawing the door for cigarettes, that I wrote a thank you to the ERB twitter. If I get the energy in me, I might make them something in gratitude for making the Maternal Parental have a happy moment for the first time in a long time.

 

Okay, I’ve put it off for long enough. Tonight’s agenda is writing and trying to flesh out the story I’m going to do for NaNoWriMo. I can put it off no longer. It’ll be September in a few hours and that’ll mark two months before this whole thing is supposed to begin. Wish my nervous ass some excellent writing skills so I can accomplish this goal.

 

*firing up the Alice in Chains and Red Hot Chili Peppers music for inspiration and relaxation*

A Snip Here and a Cut There

Greetings, Peoples of the Sun. This is my Aerogarden as of the 12th of August 2015. I’ve done a bit of pruning on the pepper and a lot of pruning on the tomato plants. As a result, the tomatoes are finally starting to catch up with the pepper plant. Previously, they were too choked with leaves to do much growing. Hopefully, they’ll both get their own places in the light before the pepper swamps everything. I’d rather them jockey for their own position in the hood light than cut them back. I’m a total wuss when it comes to cutting my plant babies. Below are the results of the pruning and my photo bombing big toe. It’s a shame that this stuff isn’t edible. Quite a bit came out of this pruning session.

 

 

Nothing much is happening right now. I’m knitting on the sweater for the Maternal Parental while I pine for the loss of my patterned credit card. Not that my credit card is actually lost, no. The replacement the issuer sent doesn’t have the pattern I chose for it eleven years ago when I first got it. It’s just a regular metallic gray color now. I has a sad over the loss of my tribal patterning. Sad smile

 

I’m not completely broken up though. It still works just the same, only with added security features. I guess this is one more signal that I’m becoming a more mature individual. A boring credit card with no pattern on it. Feh.

 

Today is Friday. Wahoo! If it weren’t for the beg-a-thon on PBS, I’d be looking forward to cooking shows tomorrow but, such as it is, I have extended time to look at my new favorite movie, Legion, followed up by my other new favorite movie, Priest. Both star Paul Bettany in some hardcore roles. I think they’re worth watching. Plus, the awesome Kevin Durand is in Legion.

 

I also have another sad to report. My Genovese basil is dying. I had to Bio-Neem it due to an infestation of Fungus Gnats. So, I have one replacement cutting I made downstairs. If this plant in my room doesn’t recover, it’ll be the beta for the dead plant. I should just start afresh with new seeds but I’m sentimental about plants. Regardless of their condition, these are my first Aerogarden babies.

 

Everything else is doing great. I’m slowly plugging along with projects. The sun is shining and the air conditioner is keeping the heat outside at bay.

 

Life is good. Rolling on the floor laughingRed heartRainbow

Interesting Turn of Events

Several months ago, my laptop died on me. It was a Dell Inspiron 17R for the people keeping score. Luckily, I’d backed everything up and had started using my Desktop (Dell Inspiron 560 for those keeping score) by the time the laptop became problematic.

Fast forward to last night. We had a power surge/outage that lasted several minutes. By this time, I’d backed up to various Cloud services and was still in the process of saving to get a new computer. I woke up this morning to the Amber Light of Death. I’m really hoping against hope that this can be fixed by a small replacement part. Otherwise, it’ll be months before I can save up enough money to get a system that can handle my needs.

In other news, my Equality Salsa Garden of Hope is really taking off.

image

Seriously hoping that html takes. I am currently working on a tablet and cell phone for all my Internet access. Could be worse. At least I’m not completely cut off.

The Equality Salsa Garden of Hope is currently twenty-four days old. All the plants are growing in a healthy manner and I look forward to having tomatoes and jalapeño peppers in a few more weeks.

Not much else is happening here. It’s hotter than hell, so I’m pretty much staying indoors with my DVD/Blu-ray collection. Going to go downstairs in a bit to watch a marathon of Doctor Who, Marvel movies and whatever else I can pull from my media shelf.

Take care, Peoples of the Sun. 😄💚🌈

Update On The Birthday Shawl

As you can see, I’ve been quite busy. I went from ten completed rows to twenty-nine. The October Rust Birthday Shawl is coming along quite well in my opinion. In all honesty, I am hoping to have it completed by the end of this month, which would fit quite nicely with my schedule.

 

I have been alternating crocheting this shawl and writing the Untitled Melusine Gordon story while listening to music during the nighttime hours. An odd thing for me, I haven’t felt the urge to turn the television on these past few weeks. That really does make a change from what I’m used to doing. The television is usually my default background noise or high altar depending on what’s on it at the time. Yet, within the past few weeks, I’ve hardly had it on. I’ve been getting my news from the Breaking News App and my weather reports from Accuweather’s App. Could this be one more thing that aging has changed for me? Confused smile

 

Last night into early this morning, I eliminated the adverbs from a part of the as yet untitled Melusine Gordon story. All these years, I’ve been writing with adverbs and weakening my stories in the process. That changes now and it’s thanks to last night’s writing assignment. I will complete the first draft of the story I’m working on now but, in future revisions, I will be eliminating as many adverbs as possible. They are now the enemy to my writing.

 

Tomorrow, I’m considering filming my first proper vlog. I am still unsure about just what I’m going to put in it but tomorrow has presented itself as a good time to do it. I might read from one of my books for part of it. I’m partial to my one Ellis Peters book, The Virgin In The Ice, as a potential filler. It’s semi-historical and it’s a mystery as well as being a very good read. Well, I’ve got the rest of today and early tomorrow morning to figure it out. The finished video should be live by tomorrow night. What on Earth am I getting myself into? *sigh* Embarrassed smile

 

The thing is, I’ve bought the stuff to film with, so I might as well do it. Wish me luck!

 

Later, Peoples of the Sun! Rolling on the floor laughingRed heartRainbow

There’s Gold In That Thar Water!

Today’s prompt was to find the third article down and include the headline in my post. Here goes…

 

Fugitive US treasure hunter Thompson pleads guilty

 

Considering everything that has come to light today and I’m meant to write about this. Oh well.

 

Apparently, this guy was wanted for evading a civil case against him brought on by his creditors. He and his accomplice had been hiding out in Boca Raton, Florida for two years under assumed names while doing everything possible to evade the authorities. To pay for stuff in cash, they had to have a lot of money. Man, I barely have bus fare. Disappointed smile

 

A plea bargain has been made and this guy will spend no more than two years in jail for skipping out with the creditor’s money. He’s also got to turn over the  $425,380 (£286,000) that was initially seized from his bank account. Considering he’s potentially sitting on top of all that largess, wow.

 

He’s going to be sitting pretty a few years from now.

 

The End. Rolling on the floor laughingRed heartRainbow